In all honesty, I’m confused about how to evaluate Jai Ho. Because it’s not a film. It’s a cartoon. So, to point out that the story is laughably ridiculous or that the characterisation has no depth seems churlish. After all, you can’t go to see a cartoon and then complain about its disconnect with reality. Since Salman Khan is his own franchise, all you can do is ask — is this a worthy installment in the cult of the star who functions as the archetypal angry young man, without any of the complexities or nuances of his 1970s predecessor?  But make no mistake — Jai Ho is wholly and solely powered by Salman. He romances, roars, sings songs, gives speeches, wipes tears and, of course, eventually takes off his shirt. Does his Incredible Hulk-sized charisma falter? No. Was I expecting anything different? No. Is this a film? No.

Sometimes Bollywood's heroes can give the ones in Hollywood a run for their money. Salman Khan is our very own Hulk. Except turning green, he does everything that the Hulk does. When someone gets him angry he can beat people to a pulp! He can kick start a car...Yes, he kicks it and it starts! He roars and he even bites! And then of you end up getting to his bad side. Then even God can't save you! 2 hours and 25 minutes long, Jai Ho is a treat for Salman fans and this time there is some bonus, Bhai is not just fighting, he is also giving a good message. Brother Sohail Khan did line up a lot of talented actors but we all know people will go for Salman Khan and watch only him. The timing is just right, at a time when Aam Aadmi is the most common term, this film comes in the middle of the right mood - showing powerful politicians in a bad light and highlighting the problems of a common man.  A Salman Khan film is an amusement ride, don't take it too seriously! Watch it with his fans and you will know what I mean!

There is absolutely nothing uncommon about Jai Ho. It is strictly hackneyed fare about a wronged man who goes berserk in his mission to rid his own life – and that of the nation – of a very powerful tormentor. The narrative is touchingly simplistic. Amid all the mayhem that is unleashed by the hackneyed good-versus-evil confrontation, humanity is alive and kicking. The Jai Ho plot has one upright policeman, one well-meaning politician, one henchman who has a change of heart, one auto-rickshaw driver who goes out of his way to be of help, a reformed alcoholic and, of course, an prim and proper elder sister who espouses all the right values. Unfortunately, with the focus of the script being squarely on Salman, the rest of the actors merely come and go without making any impact. Jai Ho is a tale that is about as exciting – and just as empty – as the spiel of a politician going to the polls. Eminently avoidable unless you are a diehard Salman Khan fan.

The one thing that left me truly touched, however? The fact that Sohail Khan took forward that lament from Austin Powers, that “people never think how things affect the family of a henchman” and showed a goon, who had been beaten up watching TV with his family and lamenting his actions. It's... It’s hard to make up, really.  As for Khan, there’s nothing new to see here. But that’s probably the point. For a man who’s pushing 50, he’s looking spry and seems to be having fun playing to type, though the absurd amounts of money his movies rake in obviously help. Having said that, my one and only laugh in Jai Ho came when Khan punched a car window and -- in a film where he throws people through all manner of doors and walls and vehicles -- explained himself saying he didn’t know it had been rolled up. Does he really want to be in on the joke now? Or maybe he already is.

The usual cautionary warning in the opening credits should have been replaced by this : in the making of this film, no Salman Khan fan was hurt. Because that’s all ‘Jai Ho’, like all Bhai vehicles, aspires to. But even for those that adore the man with agate bracelet, I’d say his new flick is little more than a damp squib.  `Jai Ho’ could have been a pure and simple `Dabangg 3’. It’s not. It’s not even a no-holds-barred South remake either, despite its quarts of spurting blood and broken bones). Jai’s ‘aam aadmi’ ( he says the phrase, and the audience erupts, rightfully, in this age of ascendant mango people ) catches traction only a moment. In the rest, he goes back to snarling and kicking and scowling. Even the shirt-off moment is not ‘Jai Ho’s money shot. Maybe Bhai should have gone in for a muffler around the head, instead.

There is nothing ordinary about this aam aadmi. He rips, roars and ravages the raavans with a single blow - like a Stallone on steroids. Jai (Salman) is an ex-Army officer, who runs a garage part-time and plays incredibly good (looking) Samaritan fulltime, beating up baddies to bloody pulp with anything from hockey sticks, chains, scaffolding and even a mighty pen. During one 'good-deed' demo, he's hit by a brainwave - a thought that can change the world! His funda seems profound but is simple. Goodness is redeemable. If someone shows you a random act of kindness, you pay it forward to three people. And they'll pass on the 'act of kindness' to three more each. A multiplier effect on millions - snowballing into a mass junta movement of goodness. There is one explosive moment of revelation in the film - when Salman tears off his shirt to show off his greased, stabbed, scarred and sensational sinews. Nothing else matters for 'bhai' fanatics. It's 'the' paise wasool moment. Rest assured, they will 'pay up' and 'take it forward'.